The Heath Mullikin Project

Thoughts for a Monday

Here’s a link to a video about a story I heard about this weekend. Watch it here. Was this an innocent mistake? What would the cost be to redo all the yearbooks? Who should pay for that? How would the school make sure all the yearbooks were collected? Am I the only one who was waiting for the mother and daughter to accept some blame? The moral of the story is ALWAYS wear underwear and make sure they are clean.

Here’s a more uplifting video about a church putting it’s money where it’s mission is.

Lastly, are there certain songs that your church responds to more than others? Songs that really get the congregation fired up? I’m not sure if it’s the rhythm or the familiarity with the song. I do know that some songs are easier to clap to than others. Is it good or bad when we insert those songs into the worship set because we know the response it will get? Just wanting your thoughts. Have a great Monday.

Some Pitfalls in Youth Ministry

It has been 12 years since my graduation from Southern Wesleyan. 12 years since my interview and hiring at Central First Wesleyan Church as the youth pastor. I have learned many lessons in those 12 years. Some I have applied effectively and some I have not. I guess today is a confession of those lessons I still have trouble applying.

1. I am up front too much. From the announcement to worship to speaking-I am always the one talking. There have got to be other faces and voices in front of the group besides mine. There isn’t because I hold onto things too tightly. Instead of taking the time to train others and release their ministry potential, I just do it myself. This can lead to burnout. Ideally, Wednesdays would run like sunday mornings with others doing their roles and me doing mine. Yeah, I’ve known this for a while, but haven’t done anything about it. Chances are, you haven’t either. If you have, add some dialogue in the comments.

2. I drive too much. I love driving the church van, but how much conversation am I missing out on in the back? What if our youth group had “designated drivers” for different events which allowed me more bonding time with the kids? What if I could have been in the middle of conversations all the way out to South Dakota? Just a thought.

3. Most of us have an hour a week for our main youth rally. I used to feel bad when I would speak longer than 15 minutes. Sometimes, I have felt like there has been an effort to cram too much stuff into that hour instead of building every thing that happens within that hour around a common theme/goal. We are supplementing our Wednesday night meeting with a Sunday night Bible study that gets deeper into the word so that Wednesdays can be more topical. Brad Cooper challenged me at Unleash this year when he said,”We do two things on Wednesday: worship and the Word. That’s it. That involves some small group time, but we leverage our time towards those 2 things.” I guess what I’m trying to say is I’m not going to feel guilty about preaching the Word for longer than 15 minutes.

4. I don’t keep my wife in the loop enough. An event may have been on my calendar for months, but it needs to be on her calendar first. We are still trying to figure out how to do this electronically. Women like surprises, but not that you have a cook-out at your house and people will be arriving in 15 minutes. It’s called communication, and I shouldn’t get upset if I have to tell her about youth group stuff more than once. How many times does she have to ask me to take care of the garbage?

5. I don’t act my age. I need more sleep than I’m getting. I need to eat healthier than I’m eating. On average, we put on several pounds a year just because we’re getting older. Add that to what I already need to lose and it’s enough to make one relapse on Mountain Dew(oops, too late). My 5 year old twins know I’m not supposed to be drinking it and they are quick to remind me. It’s not about living slower, but living smarter. You young pups would be wise to lay off the dang pizza before it’s too late. It’s called metabolism and mine left the buidling with Elvis.

My to do list:

1. Get a babysitter for Friday night.

2. PIck up tickets for Grasshopper’s game

3. Plan games for camp.

4. Make 3 business calls.

5. Set up sanctuary for praise band practice.

6. Call Tuggle about camp worship songs.

7. Return movies and books to library.

8. Finish SFD Road Trip stuff.

9. Pick up kids for the CHAMP Center.

10. Haircut and workout.

11. Get in bed before 11.

12. Scrap my to do list and enjoy a day with the Drake.

First Impressions

We went to Mi Pueblo, a Mexican restaurant in Lexington on Mother’s Day. We chose to eat on the patio waited patiently for our server. Here’s what happened in the time it took him to actually take our order.
1.   Karen took the girls to the bathroom.
2.   Drake was in the high chair long enough that he got tired of it so I got him out and took him to the van to get some coloring books and toys.
3.   I started sweating since my back was in the sun.
4.   Karen and I both needed and received drink refills from our server.
When I got back to the table with Drake I asked Karen if our order had been taken. She said no, but the server came right then. There is usually a point when I put on the “5 minute clock.” If our order hasn’t been taken in that time then we leave. We have left a few restaurants over the years who’ve failed to get the job done. Now, I don’t start the clock when we’re first seated so I’m not being unreasonable. The food was great at Mi Pueblo’s. It was the best burrito I’ve ever eaten. It did not feel like the cookie cutter menu item that many Mexican restaurant’s serve. The kids all cleaned their plates. Then it took forever to get our bill. Dude, when 3 kids get restless, you gotta get moving. The kids had been great, but they had been asked to sit and be still an awfully long time due to our service delays. Bottom line: I don’t know if we’re gonna go back. They had one shot and they blew it. The one thing they have going for them is that they’re the closest Mexican restaurant to us.
Now, this whole episode made me think about the church. How many times have first time guests left disappointed with their experience? How many times have we blown our one shot? People’s souls are far more important than chips and salsa, but are we swinging for the fences every time we open the doors or just mailing it in every now and then? Now, contrast Sunday’s experience with Monday night. I went to pick up some pizza and breadsticks at Papa’s Pizza. I paid the bill and got in the van. Right before I pulled out of the parking lot, the cashier caught my attention. He told me he realized he didn’t give me the special price and owed me money. I followed him back in and he gave me back $4. I hadn’t caught the mistake, but this guy chased me down when he did. Their pizza is not the best every time, but it’s service like that which creates customer loyalty. I wonder if churches offered an “hour back guarantee” if people would come knowing that if they didn’t like the service then they could get their hour back. We’ve got to treat every week like it’s our only opportunity to make a first and lasting impression.

Weekend Wrap Up

1. As a Trekkie, I loved the new Star Trek. I think it was a succesful relaunch of the series and we will probably see at least 2 more movies with this cast. Hopefully, one of them will involve Klingons.

2. FUEL was great. Matt Rhodes and Scott Simmons did a great job planning. Andy Roy leads worship in a way that puts all the emphasis on God and Josh LeRoy pulled no punches and was very transparent. Great to catch up with the SC crew. Last year, we had 170 at the one at HQ. This year there were close to 300 gathered at the 4 Area FUELS. Though I like the ones with everyone involved, it seems like we need to do what reaches the most people. Wherever and whatever we do, I will be there as Matt’s unofficial assistant and late night activities coordinator.

3. Gonna blog about the Epicenter in downtown Charlotte sometime this week. Somebody had a vision and has turned it into a fortune. I have never seen so many youth pastors get carded in my life, but it was for the bowling alley and movie theater. The night lifestyle costs a lot and not all of it is financial. For many of the people we encountered, their drunken state was the highlight of their day/week. We all agreed that if not for the grace of God, that’s where we would be too.

4. I have to have a hard conversation with someone this week. I could pass it off to someone else, but I feel like it’s my responsibility. It’s about Competence more than Character. They’re just not getting the job done. I will have to get “permission” to have this conversation, but it must be done.

5. Had an interesting experience at Mi Pueblo Mexican restaurant yesterday. Lousy service, but it was the best burrito I’ve ever eaten. Again, it deserves a full blog later this week.

6. Got to make some FHTM business calls this week.

7. I thought Annie Duke got robbed on the Celebrity Apprentice. Personally, Mr. Trump, I think the only role models you could find on this show were Clint Black and Herschel Walker. I don’t remember them cursing anyone or throwing anyone under the bus. Were Joan Rivers 30 years younger and pulling her act, she would’ve been fired much earlier. It was reverse ageism I think. She won because she was old. My son is older than her face though.

8. Red Sox got a big win against Tampa Bay last night. I just hope Pedroia’s injury isn’t that serious.

9. For some reason, my phone’s ear piece isn’t working and I can only hear calls on speaker phone. Also, my txt’s won’t go to Twitter anymore. Not a good thing to happen when you’re out of town.

I’m off to Denton Elementary for lunch with the girls. It’s pizza day!

Friday Fun

I’m here in Charlotte for the Southern Area FUEL. So far, Josh LeRoy has presented some hard teaching. It has not been the rah rah pat on the back kind of stuff. He has been transparent about his own personal dealings with the subjects he’s addressed: racial reconciliation and mercy. Bottom line from Josh has been that if we feed people but fail to share the gospel then we have missed the point. Lots of John Wesley references. Appropriate since he is a great example of how to do both effectively. He shared some personal experiences from his neighborhood including various shootings that have occured. Josh does not live in New York City. He lives in Asheboro. Well, Philip Martin scored us some free breakfast so it’s off to facc what is sure to be an interesting one. I’m hoping we have a big group go see the new Trek tonight. We shall see. I miss my wife and kids. I will see them in 24.