Sorry this video is so shaking. I’m just too excited!
Youth Ministry
The Jerry MacGuire post
The past week and a half has been a whirlwind. Situations, planned and unplanned, have been a source of stress for me and my family. There have been a lot of “rubber meets the road” ministry opportunities. Nothing was covered in any class, seminar, or training that have ever been to. It has made me painfully aware of the grip that sin has on our small town. I have mentioned before the sense of oppression here. That things are never going to get better. That things are the way they are and that’s the way it is. I have seen and heard things recently that literally blow my mind as to how Satan is attacking out town, our children, and our families. Stuff you hear on the news is hitting right here at home. Too often, there is a “no worries” attitude about it all. I think I want to call it “Bible Belt-itis.” We live in an area where everyone “goes” to church or knows someone who “goes” to church or used to “go” to church. This is American Christianity in a nutshell. It’s like getting your oil changed. Get it done every once and a while at the cheapest and fastest place you can find and everything will be alright. The Bible talks very plainly about people who don’t tithe, aren’t active as the body of Christ, sin freely, spend foolishly, engage in sexual immorality, neglect their families, and speak with untamed tongues. It says those people are lost, foolish, heathen, will not inherit the kingdom of God(Galatians 5:19-21), and are to be chased after like a lost sheep, coin, and son(Luke 15). I am taking a hard look in the mirror today. Am I doing enough to shed the love and light of Christ in this town? What price am I willing to pay to see all 2,000 residents won to the Kingdom of Christ? You cannot actively rebel against the will of God and be a Christian. You can’t be living in sin and expect to see the gates of Heaven, pearly or not. I am too tired and too old to be beating around the bush in regards to the sin that has overcome so many people I know and love. I want to be a little more like Peter and little less like a pansy. So, to everyone in Denton, if you’re looking for a youth pastor who’s cool with your kid never having their Bible with them…I’m not your guy. If you’re fine with your sons looking at porn on the family computer with no accountability…can’t help you. If it’s okay with you that your daughter dresses like she just walked off of the set of MTV’s Spring Break-Out…sorry. If you’re looking for someone to cry with you when your child, whom you’ve never modeled the Christian life for or tried to seriously engage with Jesus through an active church youth group, turns up pregnant, drugged up, dropped out, alcoholic, porn addict with an STD you can’t pronounce then I will be happy to hold your hand, answer the “how” question bluntly, and do everything within the power God gives me to see you and your child redeemed by the blood of Christ. This afternoon, I will be making phone calls. I will be laying it on the line with lots of kids. God, forgive me for not doing and being this sooner. What’s that smell? Smells like a Revolution to me. Who’s with me?
Deja Vu from 2 years ago
Here’s a post from over 2 years ago. Ironic that we just finished painting the youth room in Denton. Anyway, here’s what was going on in my life 2 years ago.
Wednesday, September 05, 2007
New Beginnings
Current mood: tired
I write this in the kitchen of the house we have just moved into. We are renting(for now) and praying that the Lord provides the money to buy. I don’t know whose wireless internet connection I’m using, but thanks. I’ll get my own this weekend. Before I get into serious matters, only a woman would choose to move into a house without tv capabilities the day before NFL Kickoff. Maybe I can bootleg some cable too. Today has been a day of what could’ve beens. I don’t like those days. I am being made to feel, unintentionally I hope, by some people that I may have been the biggest roadblock to numerical growth at my former job. 99% of the people I talk to are concerned with what’s going on with us right now. The other 1% seems to call to tell how great things are now that we’re gone. I want things to be great. I want God to do amazing things. I don’t even think these people know that the way they are conveying information to me makes me feel like a big ole pile of poop. But, it does. Never in my entire ministry have I needed my creativity more than I do now. It just ain’t there. I have a 450 square foot youth center that I can do anything I want with. The only problem is that funding is limited. Already we have a stinking huge TV and someone donated an 8 channel mixer. We’ve got a ping pong table, pool table, and foosball table that we don’t really have room for(well, it’s them or room for people). So, here’s my dilemma. How do I make a cool room with enough space for people to sit while maximizing my resources? My brain doesn’t even work to pick out colors. I am so desperate that I am blogging about it after hours of prayer. Actually, I think this blog is a prayer. A reminder to God that I’m where He placed me. A reminder that it’s His kingdom to build. All I have to offer is a 460 square foot two car garage and a bunch of people who are willing to paint and work. What’s weird is I’m trying to get people to see that this is only a temporary solution. I want them to dream about a new Family Life Center. I want them to realize that this isn’t our destination, but a pit stop. So, there you have it. Would it be nice to have the money to go out and buy a bunch of stuff? Absolutely, and I would do it in a heartbeat. But that’s not where we’re at in our journey. No, God is stretching us. Some days it feels like we’re going to snap, but I know that one morning i am going to wake up and the light bulb is going to come on again in the creative side of my brain. Then, it’s on. Gates of hell shall not prevail kind of stuff. Can’t put a price on that.
Fantasy Football and Church Leadership
My First Fantasy Football draft I had a specific strategy. I would draft players to fill all my starting positions(Quarterback, 2 Running Backs, 2 Wide Receivers/TightEnds, Defense/Special Teams, and Kicker) before drafting bench players. I would also have a sub for each position. This strategy worked as I won the championship that year. I used the same strategy the next year and made it to the finals. I didn’t tweak the strategy much for several years. My thinking was: it’s more important to draft someone who will actually be scoring points than someone who will be on the bench.
A few years ago, I read a Fantasy Football article that blew this strategy out of the water. The thinking was that it’s better to draft RB’s and WR’s for your bench because, for the most part,(after the top 3 or 4) TE’s, K’s, and Def’s are a dime a dozen. I started drafting these 3 positions in the last 3 rounds and not having a sub for any of them. RB’s and WR’s are liable to score more points or have a breakout season. You can always drop an unproductive RB or WR and pick up a TE, K, or DEF when a bye week hits. I crack up when I see guys draft multiple TE’s, K, and DEF early in drafts while I’m getting productive RB’s and WR’s. Now, what does this have to do with church leadership?
First, there should be no bench players in the church. How are we choosing our leaders and are we putting them in the right place where there strengths will shine through? Or, are we selecting niche leaders instead of strong leaders? Are we putting the person who can weave baskets in leadership simply because we want to find a place for them? Is our church even strategic enough to know what kind of leaders we need and what we’re looking for them to do? Sometimes, we pick leaders because of their last name or who invited them. Are we picking people to fill a spot or we actually looking for those who will contribute to the mission and vision of our church/ministry? Sometimes, I think we are totally unprepared when a new leader emerges. We are not ready to cultivate and empower them for ministry so that initial burst of enthusiasm goes away. We have got be more prepared to harness that enthusiasm and have the strategies in place so leaders/volunteers can find that place where they can serve with passion and purpose. Many people spend their lives going through the motions. The last thing they want to do is volunteer, lead, or serve in a capacity that doesn’t challenge, stretch, and empower them in their faith. So, who are you going to draft and who needs to be removed from your team?
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Thoughts on a Variety of Topics
1. I wonder how a pro-life supporter can kill someone(in a church)in cold blood because that person is pro-choice.
2. I wonder how many pastors(youth pastors especially) we will see get “let go”, “fired”, “inner circle word for getting fired(copyright, Heath Mullikin 2008)” before the Wesleyan denomination steps in and adds some real job protections to the Discipline. How about when the youth pastor signs a yearly housing lease(because he’s asked to by the board) and shortly after is let go with a pricey out clause? In the corporate world, that’s a lawsuit waiting to happen. On the flip side, if the pastor jets in an untimely and unclassey way then he should be penalized like a college basketball coach. At some point, a DS should step in and say, “nope, you ain’t gonna do that to these good people. You’re taking a year off.”
3. I wonder if the John Wesley movie is going to be as bad as I think it is. I wonder if the 5’4″ Wesley appreciates being portrayed by a guy big enough to be an NFL TE(that’s Tight End for all you non-fantasy football players). I wonder if, as Wesleyans, we are obligated to promote a substandard product which may do more harm than good. Of course, the film may be great and I will see it regardless. I thought “Amazing Grace” was great. I just don’t see Mr. Calvin getting this kind of theatrical treatment. When I see the movie(can’t find the release date on www.comingsoon.net which isn’t a good sign) I will give it a fair review and probably take a bunch of people to see it with me. We may even rent out the whole theater. I’m sure Jam can get us a deal at Cinemark in Asheboro.
4. I wonder if TLC is “The Learning Channel” then what are they teaching us with season 5 of Jon and Kate(episode 2 is on as I type). Why would the couple or the network sign on for 40 episodes in the midst of the beginnings of the current scandal(oh wait, I just dropped a dollar, now where was I)? This season is going to be like Nascar-everyone is watching for the wrecks.
5. I wonder how I game I am so terrible at(golf) brings me so much joy? I will break 100 before year’s end. Just gotta get my arm fixed first. Is there such a thing as golfer’s elbow/forearm or that just called old man syndrome?
6. I wonder why I made my wife wait while I finished typing this. I’m an idiot.
Some Pitfalls in Youth Ministry
It has been 12 years since my graduation from Southern Wesleyan. 12 years since my interview and hiring at Central First Wesleyan Church as the youth pastor. I have learned many lessons in those 12 years. Some I have applied effectively and some I have not. I guess today is a confession of those lessons I still have trouble applying.
1. I am up front too much. From the announcement to worship to speaking-I am always the one talking. There have got to be other faces and voices in front of the group besides mine. There isn’t because I hold onto things too tightly. Instead of taking the time to train others and release their ministry potential, I just do it myself. This can lead to burnout. Ideally, Wednesdays would run like sunday mornings with others doing their roles and me doing mine. Yeah, I’ve known this for a while, but haven’t done anything about it. Chances are, you haven’t either. If you have, add some dialogue in the comments.
2. I drive too much. I love driving the church van, but how much conversation am I missing out on in the back? What if our youth group had “designated drivers” for different events which allowed me more bonding time with the kids? What if I could have been in the middle of conversations all the way out to South Dakota? Just a thought.
3. Most of us have an hour a week for our main youth rally. I used to feel bad when I would speak longer than 15 minutes. Sometimes, I have felt like there has been an effort to cram too much stuff into that hour instead of building every thing that happens within that hour around a common theme/goal. We are supplementing our Wednesday night meeting with a Sunday night Bible study that gets deeper into the word so that Wednesdays can be more topical. Brad Cooper challenged me at Unleash this year when he said,”We do two things on Wednesday: worship and the Word. That’s it. That involves some small group time, but we leverage our time towards those 2 things.” I guess what I’m trying to say is I’m not going to feel guilty about preaching the Word for longer than 15 minutes.
4. I don’t keep my wife in the loop enough. An event may have been on my calendar for months, but it needs to be on her calendar first. We are still trying to figure out how to do this electronically. Women like surprises, but not that you have a cook-out at your house and people will be arriving in 15 minutes. It’s called communication, and I shouldn’t get upset if I have to tell her about youth group stuff more than once. How many times does she have to ask me to take care of the garbage?
5. I don’t act my age. I need more sleep than I’m getting. I need to eat healthier than I’m eating. On average, we put on several pounds a year just because we’re getting older. Add that to what I already need to lose and it’s enough to make one relapse on Mountain Dew(oops, too late). My 5 year old twins know I’m not supposed to be drinking it and they are quick to remind me. It’s not about living slower, but living smarter. You young pups would be wise to lay off the dang pizza before it’s too late. It’s called metabolism and mine left the buidling with Elvis.